After listening to Hua Rong's account, Ji Xiaofu was overwhelmed with guilt.
Previously, he had only felt guilty Ning Shuang, that he had betrayed her affections. But now, Ji Xiaofu felt he had wronged not only Ning Shuang but also Qin Sisi. It was he who had mishandled his feelings, giving her hope only to let her down.
His mind alternately conjured images of Ning Shuang and Sisi.
Ning Shuang was gone, and Sisi had been reduced to tears by his harsh words. He wondered if they were now in some lonely corner, licking their emotional wounds alone.
Consumed by remorse, Ji Xiaofu drank alone in silence, repeatedly striking himself in frustration.
"Master, please stop drinking!" Qin An said, his voice filled with concern.
"Qin An, let me drink," Ji Xiaofu replied.
He thought of Ning Shuang—orphaned at a young age, with no one to rely on. Where could she be now?
She had no home to return to!
These thoughts filled Ji Xiaofu with such anguish that he sought only to numb himself with alcohol.
"Master, you must pull yourself together!" Qin An urged. "If Miss Ning Shuang saw you like this, she would be heartbroken."
"Master, let's go look for her again," Qin An added.
"It's useless. If she wanted to come back, she would have done so already," Ji Xiaofu said.
"She's deliberately hiding from us. We'll never find her."
"What do you mean by that,Master?" Qin An asked, confused.
"Qin An, the day we went to find her, I could sense her presence, but no matter how hard I looked, I couldn't see her. I knew she was there, but she didn't want to see me." Ji Xiaofu fought back tears and sighed.
Perhaps it was the telepathy between lovers.
That day, noticing the ink on Ning Shuang's letter was still fresh, Ji Xiaofu had guessed she hadn't gone far. He immediately rushed to the places they often visited together.
He caught a faint whiff of Ning Shuang's fragrance and felt as if someone were behind him. He searched everywhere but found no trace of her.
Ji Xiaofu called out her name loudly, but there was no response.
Finally, he found her veil in the grass.
He knew she had been there, right beside him, but he had been unable to see her.
With Ning Shuang's extraordinary lightness skill, evading him was effortless.
Ji Xiaofu was right—Ning Shuang had been there.
Hearing his voice, she had hurried to hide, and in her fluster, her veil had fallen into the grass, where Ji Xiaofu found it.
She did care for Ji Xiaofu, yet she lacked the courage to accept his love.
In Ji Xiaofu's presence, she felt inferior.
Though she had read some books, her mother had passed away when she was ten, leaving her with little more than basic literacy—just enough to avoid being illiterate. Ji Xiaofu, however, was a renowned scholar of great repute.
She was a helpless orphan, while he was a celebrated talent known throughout the land.
When she first visited his home and saw the beautiful garden, she had been astonished.
He was the wealthiest man in the region!
And she was just a poor girl.
She had secretly hidden the sword she always carried, simply because she had heard his mother disliked women of the martial world.
The day Hua Rong's men informed Ning Shuang that Ji Xiaofu was with him, she had waited at home.
As time passed and night deepened without his return, Ning Shuang grew worried and went to Hua Rong's house to look for him.
But she was told Ji Xiaofu wasn't there.
Puzzled, Ning Shuang made inquiries and eventually learned he was at a restaurant.
Rushing there, she happened to see two women clinging to Ji Xiaofu, forcing wine on him.
Witnessing that scene, Ning Shuang's world crumbled.
She had never imagined Ji Xiaofu would deceive her.
Her heart felt as if it were bleeding!
She had wanted to rush in and confront him, but she couldn't bring herself to do it.
Tears streaming down her face, Ning Shuang left silently.
Suddenly, there was a loud bang as the door was kicked open!
At that moment, Qin Sisi arrived.
Ning Shuang witnessed everything that followed.
She heard Ji Xiaofu's conversation with Sisi and learned that Qin Sisi also loved him.
Even though Ji Xiaofu had rejected Qin Sisi,
Ning Shuang had seen his reluctance and confusion.
It was true that Ji Xiaofu loved Ning Shuang more.
But it was also true that he preferred Qin Sisi's personality and enjoyed being with her more.
Ning Shuang recalled the way Ji Xiaofu and Qin Sisi interacted.
With Qin Sisi, he was so relaxed, joking and playing around.
But with her, he was always tense.
He was like a responsible elder brother, caring for and protecting her, but he never joked with her.
Ji Xiaofu treated Ning Shuang with the tenderness of an elder brother toward his sister, or more precisely, like a father toward his daughter.
Though Ji Xiaofu was only seven years older than Ning Shuang, he was far too mature, while she was still naive.
Thus, he cared for and protected her like a father.
Ning Shuang felt their relationship resembled that of siblings or father and daughter, but never lovers.
Ning Shuang envied Qin Sisi.
Qin Sisi was beautiful, the daughter of a prime minister, and possessed a confidence, generosity, passion, and persistence that Ning Shuang admired.
She was bold, straightforward, passionate, and unrestrained—like a female hero of the martial world.
Though Ning Shuang was also a "heroine," she was an orphan with no parents.
Influenced by her mother's teachings, Ning Shuang had a melancholic streak.
Compared to Qin Sisi, she was more like a young lady confined to the inner chambers.
Ning Shuang often thought of her mother, Yingying.
Her mother's love had been perfect, but she had paid a heavy price for it.
She often wept alone, her emotional scars never fully healing.
As a child, Ning Shuang hadn't understood why her mother was always so melancholic, but now she was beginning to comprehend.
She yearned for love, yet feared following in her mother's footsteps.
Qin Sisi was the daughter of a prime minister!
If Ji Xiaofu chose her, he might offend the prime minister!
This was no mere local tyrant. Ning Shuang worried their lives would be miserable.
If Ji Xiaofu chose Qin Sisi, Ning Shuang—she lacked the courage to face it all.
After all, she was his betrothed, officially engaged to him!
They had held a grand engagement ceremony. How could she have the courage to face this?
And he would be accused of favoring wealth over love, of currying favor with those in power.
Ning Shuang had always felt inferior in Ji Xiaofu's presence, and these events only deepened her lack of courage to accept his love.
She just wanted to escape...
Unable to bring herself to accept his love, yet unwilling to let Ji Xiaofu be branded as someone who abandoned the poor to cling to the rich and powerful, she... fled.
Ning Shuang left, voluntarily withdrawing from his world.
"Shuang'er, perhaps leaving is the best choice for you. Ji Xiaofu is a mere mortal, unable to give you the happiness you desire, always making you sad," Ji Xiaofu consoled himself.
"Shuang, do you know? If I could, I would spend my entire life protecting you. As long as you're happy, I would have no regrets—even if I could only watch you from afar..."
Ji Xiaofu murmured in his heart.
"Shuang'er, I so badly want to know where you are. I just need to know you're safe and doing well, and I'll be at ease."
"I want nothing else, as long as I know you're doing well—that's enough."
Ji Xiaofu spoke to himself.
Eventually, Ji Xiaofu gave up searching for Ning Shuang, content to secretly inquire about her from afar.
After a period of low spirits, Ji Xiaofu gradually emerged from his slump, devoting all his energy to government affairs.
He was a man, and his world contained much more than love and affection.
With Ning Shuang gone, Ji Xiaofu cast off the 枷锁 in his heart, becoming even more unrestrained.
"Princess, there's a new official named Ji Xiaofu who's been opposing us. Several of our men have been impeached by him," a subordinate reported.
"Is that so?"
Yan Anning stretched lazily, cast a contemptuous glance at her subordinate, and paid little heed.
"Yes, Princess, it's true," another subordinate added.
"Ji Xiaofu?"
Yan Anning repeated the name, trying to recall any information about him, but drew a blank.
Naturally, with Ji Xiaofu's status, he hadn't warranted her attention.
She was the daughter of Yan Fulun, the emperor's uncle, and the niece of Consort Yan, the emperor's favorite concubine.
Yan Fulun was Consort Yan's elder brother. He had rendered great service during the "An-Shi Rebellion," earning titles and promotions. Later, with his sister becoming the emperor's favorite, his power grew immense, making him a sworn enemy of Prime Minister Yang Yan and others.
Yan Anning was Yan Fulun's only daughter. Since Yan Fulun had been granted the title of prince due to his favor, she was addressed as "Princess."
Yan Anning's usual associates were those of high rank and great power, those who commanded military forces.
She was extremely intelligent and breathtakingly beautiful, Yan Fulun's most capable assistant.
Father and daughter wielded enormous influence in the court, their power so great that all officials feared them.
"Go find out who this Ji Xiaofu is and where he comes from," Yan Anning ordered.
"Your Highness, we've already investigated," the subordinate replied.
"Who is he?"
"Ji Xiaofu passed the imperial examinations last year and served as magistrate of Qi County. Due to his success in implementing the 'Two-Tax System,' he was recommended by the Minister of Personnel and promoted to Censor-in-Chief, responsible for supervising officials and upholding court discipline. He's known as the 'Top Talent of Jiangnan,' is the wealthiest man in Luzhou, and is sworn brothers with Hua Rong."
"So, he rose through Hua Rong's connections?"
"Based on current information, that seems to be the case," the subordinate replied.
"Impossible!"
Clearly, Yan Anning was dissatisfied with this answer.
What did it matter if he was a wealthy merchant or the so-called "Top Talent of Jiangnan"?
What did it matter if he had the support of the Minister of Personnel?
He was just a lowly Censor-in-Chief.
Though his duty was to supervise officials, Yan Anning paid him no mind.
Even the chief prime minister, Yang Yan, had to show her some deference, let alone a mere censor.
"Is there anyone else backing him?" Yan Anning pressed further.
"Well..." The subordinate hesitated, then thought and replied, "He's currently in favor with Lord Qin."
"Lord Qin?"
Yan Anning was puzzled.
She had assumed Ji Xiaofu had relied on his relationship with Hua Rong to gain the support of Hua Rong's father, the Minister of Personnel. She hadn't expected him to be connected to Lord Qin.
Lord Qin and Yang Yan were both prime ministers, equally stubborn and often at odds over policy, frequently clashing.
Since Ji Xiaofu had been promoted for his success in implementing the "Two-Tax System," he should have been aligned with Prime Minister Yang Yan. How had he become associated with Lord Qin?
Yan Anning couldn't make sense of it.
Seeing her confusion, the subordinate added, "Princess, Ji Xiaofu is quite a celebrity now! The entire capital is talking about him!"
"A celebrity?"
Yan Anning was even more confused.
She usually only concerned herself with court affairs and paid no attention to trivial gossip, so despite Ji Xiaofu's fame in the capital, she was completely unaware of him.
"Your Highness, Ji Xiaofu is charming and particularly skilled at pleasing women. Lord Qin's daughter, Qin Sisi, is utterly infatuated with him. Just recently, she smashed up a restaurant. Rumor has it, it was because he was fooling around with another woman."
"He's now a frequent guest of Lord Qin's, and Lord Qin has long had the intention of taking him as a son-in-law."
"Word is, he's also had some dalliances with Lord Li's daughter, Li Ruru."
"People say these two young ladies have been secretly competing for him," the subordinate replied.
"Interesting."
"This is getting more and more interesting."
"Two of the capital's most prominent young women—one the most beautiful, the other the most talented—vying secretly for the same man."
Yan Anning let out a cold laugh.
"It seems I need to go out among the people for a while!"