Chapter 60 Gong Jie II

　　—Everyone hopes to live like summer flowers, yet many live as bleakly as the autumn wind. Living is difficult; one must live not only for oneself but also for one’s family, for every living person has a mission.

　　The attack of the WolfEating Eagles inflicted heavy losses upon the cooks’ squad: two members were dead; another two had been carried off by the strange birds, their fate unknown and more likely ill than well.

　　Now only Ji Mazi, Gong Jie and two other cooks remained alive.

　　Gong Jie sat upon the ground weeping bitterly; in her heart she continually blamed herself.

　　If she had not thrust her head out, if she had not chopped the strange bird’s toe, if… yet in this world there is no “if,” only results. Time cannot flow backward; Old Wu and Ge Wu could never again stand before her eyes full of life and vigor.

　　Had Old Wu and Ge Wu not risked their lives to help her, the one who died would have been she. She was still alive, yet those who had saved her were already dead; her heart was filled with a sense of guilt.

　　Ji Mazi and the two surviving cooks roughly buried the bodies of the dead beneath two strange trees. Just at that moment the Great Chieftain’s order came down: without a moment’s delay, break camp at once and leave this place under cover of night.

　　Ji Mazi pulled up Gong Jie, who sat collapsed upon the ground weeping like a pear blossom in the rain: “Second Miss, this place is not suitable for lingering; we must leave with all speed.”

　　The members of the guard responsible for escorting the supply wagons at the very rear of the embassy party had also suffered deaths and injuries; the camelhorses of the supply wagons and the drivers were already dead.

　　The supply wagons could not be abandoned; the capital was still far away and along the way supplies could not be obtained at any moment.

　　Ji Mazi found two riderless camelhorses in the vicinity, harnessed them to the shafts, and made them pull the supply wagons. One cook acted as driver of the supply wagons; another cook sat beside the driver holding a woodchopping knife on guard.

　　The wagon originally used by the cooks’ squad had already been destroyed. Ji Mazi somehow led back two more riderless camelhorses and asked Gong Jie whether she could ride a camelhorse.

　　Gong Jie was captain of the Women’s Gathering Escort and of course could ride a camelhorse. Ji Mazi and Gong Jie mounted the camelhorses and followed the embassy party, groping forward through the night.

　　Yet at that moment Gong Jie upon the camelhorse’s back still wept without cease.

　　“Second Miss, the dead cannot return to life. You must pull yourself together—this journey is still long.” Ji Mazi advised.

　　“It is all my fault. Had it not been for me, Old Wu and Ge Wu would not have died—especially Ge Wu. He and I slipped out secretly behind my father’s back; the result is that I am perfectly fine while he is gone. How am I to explain this to my father? My father will certainly not spare me. Better that I die as well.”

　　“Second Miss, what is the motto of our hunter people?”

　　“Live toward death; die and be reborn.” Gong Jie answered through sobs.

　　“Correct. The Nanyu Forest is filled with maneating beasts. Every morning when we hunters open our eyes we face the choice of life or death; no one knows whether he will still see tomorrow’s sunrise.”

　　In the darkness Ji Mazi’s eyes were especially bright; he continued to advise Gong Jie: “Every one of us hunters, including the Great Chieftain, must regard death as a return home and look lightly upon life and death. What joy is there in life? What fear in death?”

　　Ji Mazi raised his head, looked at the starry sky, and said slowly: “Since Old Wu and Ge Wu have already been chosen by the God of Death, we can only pray that they follow the Yellow Clan Celestial Gods and ascend to heaven. Their deaths are so that we may live better; therefore those of us who remain alive must not only live but live splendidly—we must live out the portion of those who have died as well.”

　　“Do you understand? Do not cry any more; otherwise Old Wu and Ge Wu will not rest in peace even beneath the Nine Springs. Moreover these terrifying strange birds may still be hiding in the dark; do not attract them again with your weeping.”

　　These words proved rather effective; Gong Jie immediately stopped her weeping, yet still shed silent tears.

　　Live toward death; die and be reborn—this was the motto handed down from generation to generation among the hunters of the Gongyou Clan, revealing the hunters’ free and easy attitude toward life and death.

　　These few sentences Gong Jie had long since heard until calluses formed upon her ears. Ordinarily pampered and privileged, she had never faced life and death as she did today. When truly facing the test of life and death she could not achieve the free and easy attitude required by the clan precept.

　　Ge Wu, as a hostage, had come to Wangqiu City nearly ten years earlier. As a childhood playmate Gong Jie had always regarded Ge Wu as an elder brother.

　　After Gong Jie entered adolescence and grew into a young woman she already understood a little of the feelings between men and women; toward Ge Wu’s attentions she always remained indifferent, assuming the lofty manner of a young lady.

　　This time she had wished to see the outside world; therefore Ge Wu had given her the idea and together they had secretly mixed into the cooks’ squad.

　　She knew that her father, Great Chieftain Gongdian, had always treated Ge Wu as a member of their own household. Now Ge Wu had been carried off by the strange bird. She truly did not know how she was to explain the matter to her father, Great Chieftain Gongdian.

　　Gong Jie rode upon the camelhorse, letting the camelhorse carry her forward.

　　Originally eight people had sat inside the wagon talking and laughing; after this battle in Fumu Forest the number of the cooks’ squad had been reduced by half. The earlier pleasant atmosphere along the road had long since flown to the ninth heaven and would never return.

　　Tearblurred Gong Jie suddenly could see nothing clearly around her. She wiped her eyes with the corner of her sleeve; it was not because tears had clouded her vision but because a dense mist had risen around them.

　　Within this dense mist there seemed to be countless ghostly shadows; beside the shadows were scattered points of light that looked somewhat like ghostfires, hazy and indistinct.

　　These ghostly shadows and ghostfires seemed ready at any moment to launch a sudden attack and swallow her, filling her with terror.

　　These ghostly shadows and ghostfires were in reality the torches lit by the soldiers ahead. The fright Gong Jie had received in the battle of Fumu Forest had already turned her into a startled bird.

　　After the dense mist rose, a great wind suddenly sprang up for no reason upon the ground; the mist was blown by this wind, dispersing and then gathering again.

　　The wind and the dense mist contended; yet no matter how the wind blew the mist could not be dispersed and always remained around the embassy party.

　　Gong Jie shivered upon the camelhorse; this wind made her feel even colder. She pulled at her collar and buried herself within the camelhorse.

　　Gradually she dared not raise her eyes to look at the dense mist; she always felt that within the dense mist there seemed to lurk an extremely terrifying power and feared being swallowed by the mist.

　　Yet at the same time she faintly sensed that within that dense mist there also seemed to dwell a warm power silently protecting them.

　　This feeling was so contradictory, yet so real and marvelous. She thought to herself: “Within that mist, how can both righteous and evil forces be entrenched at the same time?”

　　After an unknown length of time the original dense black mist gradually turned white—day had broken.

　　Yet the mist had not dispersed; on the contrary it grew denser.

　　As they walked, sudden curses suddenly arose from the front of the column.

　　Ji Mazi spurred his mount toward the front of the column; after a short while he returned.

　　“Second Miss, truly strange—ahead they have discovered the corpses of last night’s strange birds and of our fallen brothers. We walked an entire night yet have been circling in the same place.”

　　“The Great Chieftain orders the column to rest in place and await orders.” An orderly’s voice came from ahead.

　　Ji Mazi and Gong Jie dismounted from their camelhorses and found a rock upon which to sit.

　　Ji Mazi took a piece of dry rations from the bag upon his back, handed it to Gong Jie, then took a piece himself and ate it with water from a leather bag: “Second Miss, about Ge Wu’s disappearance—I feel we must go and report it to the Great Chieftain.”

　　“Uncle Ji, I beg you—do not tell my father. If he knows he will beat me to death.”

　　“Second Miss, the earlier we report to the Great Chieftain the lighter my own culpability will be.”

　　After a little food settled in her stomach Gong Jie’s previously turbulent emotions calmed considerably. She pondered a moment and said: “Uncle Ji, at present we are still surrounded by crises; this is not the time to report this matter to my father.”

　　Gong Jie’s thought was to delay as long as possible; she continued: “When we leave this grove of strange trees and a suitable opportunity arises I shall personally confess the truth to my father.”

　　“Very well—then let it be as Second Miss says.”

　　“Yet please rest assured—none of this has anything to do with you. It was all Ge Wu’s and my idea; we forced you. I believe my father will not blame you.”

　　“Since matters have come to this, it can only be so. At present I can only pray that Ge Wu is unharmed and that one day he will appear before us again full of life. Yet our cooks’ squad has suffered severe losses; I must report upward and hope they will allocate some more hands.”

　　Strangely, just as the two were speaking a sudden strong wind arose and blew the dense mist completely away; the scene before their eyes immediately brightened a great deal.

　　“Damn it—truly a strange matter. This place is indeed sinister.” Ji Mazi cursed.

　　Everyone successively mounted their camelhorses and continually lashed them with leather whips, wishing to leave this uncanny place as quickly as possible.

　　Whether from the state of their spirits or for some other reason, when they fled Fumu Forest the sound of the camelhorses’ hooves beneath them seemed especially cheerful.

　　These camelhorses were clearly treading upon earth, yet the sound of the hooves seemed like treading upon hard stone slabs; the “taptaptaptap” was especially clear and ringing, like a symphony.

　　Everyone spurred their mounts hard; after about an hour they finally reached the end of Fumu Forest. Opposite them the great grassland could already be seen.

　　Seeing the green grass in the distance, the camelhorse beneath Gong Jie broke into a full gallop; it had been tormented for a day and a night without rest, its belly long empty, and wished as soon as possible to taste the flavor of fresh green grass.

　　After leaving Fumu Forest Gong Jie looked back in the direction of Fumu Forest. Within that grove of giant cactuslike trees Old Wu, Ge Wu… and many unknown hunter brothers had remained forever.

　　At the thought Gong Jie could not help feeling sorrow rise again and shed tears.

　　Live toward death; die and be reborn. The dead are gone; the living must continue bravely forward.

　　Gong Jie wiped her tears and said silently to herself: “Gong Jie, you must become strong. Since you have chosen to come out and see the world you must be able to endure wind and rain.”